I've been in a REALLY bad place lately. And I cant even talk about it. Theres one person in the whole world who knows everything. I'll call her Poodle. Poodle has been my fucking rock. The ONE person to stand by me holding my hand through everything, regardless of my choices. If it wasnt for her, I would have totally crumbled. Words cannot even describe how lucky I am to have her in my life.
Some shit went down in 2011, that I will never EVER forgive myself for or forget. Ever. I'm trying to be a whole person again. But I dont think its possible. I dont know what to do or where to go. I feel alone and sad. Let me clarify that my divorce has ZERO to do with anything I am feeling. That was the best thing to come out of 2011.
I think I'm going to start writing again more frequently. Maybe it will help me. Maybe it wont. Who the fuck knows.
I just know I need something.