Thursday, October 9, 2008

Woooosaaaa....

Anyone? No one? Psht!

Anyway, I'm doing some deep breathing exercises (the only kind of exercise I get!) I'm still quite worried about the HSG, but those of you who have commented have made me feel much better. So thank you!
I did manage to score a Xanax from a friend of mine, and I do believe I will be popping that little sucker beforehand! Hells yes! I hope I don't get all dopey from it, as I have never taken anything like this before. Although......perhaps being drugged might be better for all involved in tomorrows procedure. I tend to get a bit mouthy when I'm in pain.
I'm a liar.
I turn into a psychotic bitch when I'm in pain. I have always been that way. I have a fairly high threshold for pain, but once I get to the point where I am in actual pain....I have only two words for you; RUUUUUN BITCH!
I get nasty. I don't mean to. But I do. The pain takes over and I turn into a class A. BITCH. Its bad.
Hmmmm, maybe its better that my poor DH isn't going to be in there with me.....Because he would most definitely bear the brunt of my nastiness. He would try to say something comforting, and I would bite his head off like a praying mantis and spit it at the radiologist. Probably not the best impression to make.

And.....get this....

I have gained back one of the pounds I lost. What the shit is THAT all about?! I have been sooooooooo good about the effin diet! I haven't cheated (except those 2 bites of cheesecake) I have followed it to the fuckin letter. And yet I have only lost a total of 2 stupid measly pounds. Fuck fuck fucking fucker! Fuck. I'm torturing myself....and for what I ask you? FOR WHAT?!
9 days.
9 long ass, suck-tas-tic days!!
No bread, no chips, no candy, no sweets what-so-ever, no pasta, NO NOTHING!! AHHHHHHHHH!!!

2 friggin pounds. That ain't right. As a matter of fact, its down right FUCKED UP. I hate to say this....because it makes my husband right, and I HATE it when he is right and I am wrong....but maybe I need to drag my sorry fat ass to the gym. *sob* I loooooath the gym. I would rather lop of my pinkie toe than work out.
Every time I see a skinny bitch on a treadmill, I want to push her off and kick her! And while I'm running my fat ass off on an elliptical and one of those skinny skanks struts past me, I have to fight the urge to jump on top of her snarling and foaming at the mouth and forcing a big fat snack down her throat. I have issues. Don't judge me.

5 comments:

Martin said...

pssst Amsterdam boy here...I can get ya the good stuff for another flash ;0)

won't help with the munchies though...

Best of luck!

Liz said...

Have you weighed your pinky toe? Maybe lopping it off would bring your weight right down ... or not.

Very, very best of luck with the HSG today. Its been a long time coming and if nothing else it will be over and a weight off your mind - hey! maybe that's why the weight hasn't shifted.

Let us know how it goes (like we could shut you up).

Anonymous said...

Wanted to let you know that I will be thinking about you today...I am anxious to hear how it goes!

Anonymous said...

Ooh, I bet the Xanax will help you out...I HAVE taken pills for anxiety before and they DEFINITELY take the edge off. I hope it helps!

And I agree, the gym sucks. I have a membership and I can't even draG myself there knowing I'm PAYING for it. Ugh.

Sarah said...

X- I'll tell ya what....you find me a bag of 100% carb free cheesy poofs or fritos,that still taste good and I'll show ya anything you want! (kidding....sorta, goddess I'm hungry!)

WFI- My pinkie toe is pretty tiny. Wouldnt take much weight off. And no my dear...you couldnt shut me up even if you tried! =P But why would you want to? I'm good shit!

Casey- I'm just plain anxious! Xanax here I come!

April- I know! Isnt it terrible when you know in your head that you're paying for something you arent even using, and you STILL cant force yourself to go? I have agreed to go. 3 days a week. NOT happy about it.