So, as I stated in my post on Saturday, I took a pregnancy test to either force my period to come or tell me I was pregnant. I cant stand being in limbo. I needed to know if I should just go back to being the cynical infertile. Or if by some miracle I was actually knocked up. Well, neither of those things happened that night. I got a negative. But still didn't get my period.
Last night however is a different story all together. Last night as my husband was on his way home I sent him a text pleading with him to pick up a pregnancy test for me because I was still just barely spotting and it had been 3 days. I just needed to do it. For me. For my sanity. He came home about an hour later with tests in hand. I grabbed the bag and flew up the stairs. My bladder was about to explode as I had been holding it for quite some time waiting for him to get home.
I sat down and proceeded to mangle the plastic package trying to get the test out. I told myself not to stare at the test, and to just set it down on the floor.
We all know I didn't do that though. I mean seriously....two fucking years....I'm staring at the goddamn test. And so I did, I stared at it. I watched as the pee soaked into the test area, watched it creep through....and as I stared, my eyes started to play tricks on me...I swore I saw the faintest second line. I squinted, and turned it every which way. I tried different lighting. I even asked my husband if he saw anything. He of course did not. No one can see an invisible line like a woman who has been TTC forfuckingever. So, I threw the test away (and only went back once to double check it!) and told myself that maybe there really was that second line there and I just needed to use morning pee. I told myself I was going to re test first thing the next day.
Less than five minutes later, I got my period. And so...my theory still stands true. The best way to get your period, is to take a pregnancy test. Except I guess my body isn't just a bitch, its a PRISSY bitch and will only pay attention when the expensive pregnancy tests are used. No store brand cheapies.
And there you have it. I'm not pregnant and I got my period. Next time I think I'll just wipe with a $20.00 bill and save myself the mental anguish.
Ps....Fuck you, infertility.