Thursday, November 12, 2009

Sometimes, people make me want to smash my own head in a heavy door.


Me in my sexy phone voice: Thank you for calling Walgreens pharmacy, how may I help you?

Old lady one the phone:(yelling) DO YOU HAVE THE SWINE FLU SHOT?!

Me in my phone voice: No ma'am, we are waiting for the government to release the H1N1 vaccine to us, once they do we will be doing a clinic.

Old lady: (still yelling) WHEN?! I NEED IT!!

Me in my slightly less than enthused phone voice: Ma'am I understand that, however, we're waiting for the government to release the vaccine to us. There is nothing we can do until we receive the vaccine. No, I do don't know when we'll be getting it in. When we do receive it the outgoing message, the one you skipped, when you first call the store will change to reflect any information that we have. When we know something, you'll know something.

Old pain in the ass:(still fucking yelling) BUT I'M OLD! I NEED TO GET THAT SWINE FLU SHOT! CAN YOU CALL ME WHEN YOU GET IT?! I NEEEEED IT! I'M 100000 YEARS OLD.

Me no longer using my phone voice: Ma'am, if I called you to let you know when we had the vaccine, I'd have to call the other 80 million Walgreens customers as well.....I'll tell you what, how 'bout you call here EVERY day. But next time, don't bypass my message. I'll change it every so often to keep you updated. M'kay?

Old bat:(amazingly not yelling anymore) Well, OK. I guess.


Me in my sexy phone voice: Walgreens pharmacy, how may I help you?

Deaf, old person: I need my flu shot!

*me banging my head on the counter*

Me still using the soft spoken phone voice: Are you referring to the seasonal flu vaccine or the H1N1 vaccine?

Old person: I neeeeed to get my flu shot!

Me: *sigh* OK, unfortunately we are unable to offer the seasonal flu vaccine as we have exhausted our supply and are unable to obtain more. We will howev....

OlderpersonwhodidnthearawordIsaid: When will you be getting more?!

Me: We wont.

Old person: Whaaaat?

Me: We. Are. Unable. To. Obtain. More. They aren't making the flu shot any longer. No one has them.

Old as fuck guy who just isn't getting it: Well where can I get my flu shot?!

Me: Good luck with that. No one has them.

OG: But....

Me: Look, I'm really sorry. I don't know what you want me to tell you. They are no longer making the seasonal flu vaccine. We cant get anymore. NO ONE CAN.

Old guy: *click*

**yes, he hung the fuck up on me. Apparently I'm just being stingy and hoarding all the flu shots for myself**


Me using a slightly defeated phone voice: Pharmacy, how may I help you?

Snarky bitch: Yes, I'd like to make an appointment for my flu shot.

Me: I'm sorry, we've exhausted our supply of the seasonal flu vaccine and are unable to obtain more.

Snarky bitch: EXCUSE ME?

Me: Huh?

Snarky bitch: What do you MEAN you don't have any?!

Me: Ma'am, we cant get anymore. They aren't being made. There is nothing I can do about that.

Snarky bitch: Well! What am I supposed to do now? I'm just going to have to switch pharmacies!

Me: Uhhhhhh, I'm not really sure what you want me to tell you.

Snarky bitch: well, the message says....

Me: Lady, I am the message. I know what it says. MY message says WE NO LONGER HAVE THE SEASONAL FLU VACCINE AND WONT BE GETTING ANYMORE.

Snarky bitch: Well what about the 1HN1?

Me: *chuckle* The H1N1 vaccine? *deep breath* We are waiting for the government to release the vaccine to us, once they do, I will update the out going message to reflect any information pertaining to the clinic dates and times. Please, feel free to call everyday and see if the message has changed.

Snarky bitch: Fine, I'll do that.

**but she wont. She'll just press random buttons until she comes back to me**


Me: Pharmacy, can I help you?

Random caller: Hieeee! Do you have anymore swine flu shots?!

Me:*another little piece of me dies* We haven't received the H1N1 vaccine yet. We're waiting for the government to release it to us, once they do, our outgoing message will be changed immediately to reflect any information pertaining to the dates and times of the H1N1 clinic.

Random caller:........oh.

Me: Yea....

Random caller: So when do you THINK you'll be getting it?

Me: I haven't the foggiest idea. Seriously, no clue. You know as much as I do now. We're all in the dark here.

Random caller:........ohhhh.

Me: Yea. Can I help you with anything else?

Random caller: You really don't know when ya'll are getting it???

Me: Nope. Not a clue. Its just gonna show up one day. Like "surprise!". Is there anything else I can assist you with?

Random caller: Can you like hold aside one for me?

Me: Are you kidding?

Random caller: *nervous laughter* uh, yea....

Me: OK have yourself a nice day.


Me: Pharmacy..

Someone I'm sure I hate: Hello? Is this the pharmacy.

Me: Yes, can I help you?

Someone I'm sure I hate: What time do you open?

Me: Um, we opened at 8am.

Someone I'm sure I hate: Oh good! I'd like to make an appointment for my flu shot.

Me: Did you hear the message?

Someone I'm sure I hate: The one when you first call the store?

Me: Yea, thats the one.

Someone I'm sure I hate: Nah, I hate those things. I'd rather talk to you.

Me: That message WAS me. And I said we don't have anymore flu shots. And that we cant get anymore.

Someone I'm sure I hate: Why not???

Me: Just cant.

Someone I'm sure I hate: Really?! When will you be able to get more.


Someone I'm sure I hate: Hello?

Me: Hmmm? What? Oh, sorry.....they don't make them anymore. We cant get them if they don't make them. I doubt they will be making anymore, they seem to be busy making the H1N1 vaccines now.

Someone I'm sure I hate: OH! So you have the swine flu shot?!

Me: No.

Someone I'm sure I hate:Oh. Um? OK.

Me: Yea. Keep trying us back though. We're hoping to get them real soon. Buh bye!

** This all starts the moment I walk into the pharmacy at 8am and continues like this ALL FUCKING DAY. While I'm typing prescriptions, answering OTHER phone calls, entering refills, getting drive thru, ringing customers out, resolving TPR's, and filling prescriptions. And people wonder why, by the time another technician comes in at 10am....I'm ready to stab someone in the face. I need a vacation. Or the flu. Either way, I wouldn't be at Walgreens, so it would be OK**


Megs said...

I am so sorry...I think that I would definitely have to slam a big heavy door on my head after that crap. I feel your pain...

womb for improvement said...

But I still don't get it. When are the vaccines coming in?




PJ said...

LMAO!!! Yea. People suck.

You can't even hardly get the H1N1 at your doctor around here. I've been waiting for about a month for the health dept. to come to my school and give it out, and HOPE that they take pity on faculty and LET us have one.

Sorry you have to deal with that.

Sarah said...

Megs- Just solidifies why I hate people.

WFI- Sorry love, I cant hear you over the sound of the phone thumping me in the forehead.

PJ- Hey...pregnant chics get to get the shot before other people. =) Hit your RE or OBGYN up.

April said...

Ugh, I'm TOTALLY annoyed just READING that. I feel your pain. I had to deal with students at my job calling in to find out if snow was cancelled whenever a snowflake fell and my conversations were exactly the same with each caller, with my voice getting MORE AND MORE irritated each call. People JUST DON'T LISTEN. Period!

Contrived said...

I would have just told my boss i thought i had the swine flu, taken a week off, and the done everything in my power to forever erase that day from my memory.

Kansas said...

I'm pretty sure I'd start packing heat to work. Mine is not the face any company would want representing them to customers. lmao!

Now, when can i get that vaccine? ;o)

I hope you make it through the flu season mentally intact.

Xbox4NappyRash said...

can't you get a flu shot on layaway?

Sarah said...

April- Nope, no one freakin listens to me. My kid doesnt, my husband NEVER listens to me, and those jerks I have to deal with at work...they sure as fuck dont listen.

Contrived- Its not just ONE day my friend, its everysinglefuckingday! I just need all this flu business to be gone!

Kansas- Wise, I'll give ya a vaccine alright!

X- Y'know, I might just start telling people if they pay me 20 bucks I'll hold a shot aside for them, and then play dumb when we finally get the vaccines. I'd make a fortune!

'Murgdan' said...

So you work in hell, eh? Ugh. Awful.

Proud to report I've alredy had BOTH my I won't bother you.


Jane G said...

I suggest you raid the vallium stocks every morning before the phone starts to ring.

Gwen said...

Wow. I would put a put a bullet in my head after a few hours of that bullshit. I give you a lot of credit.

So when can I get my swine flu shot?

Chelsea Lietz said...

sorry, I'm seriously laughing... though I doubt it is funny to you any longer.

Anonymous said...


Omg. Work in Walgreen's pharmacy too and this same conversation occupies a good 15% of my day.

Crystal said...

I work at Walgreens and the same shit...EVERYDAY